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@tazdevil | |
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Forgive me for the long post, but I need some advice about a friend of mine. So about 10 years ago (now this is where it gets long lol) I met this girl on a chat site, and we ended up becoming REALLY close friends. We talked daily, but there was always some sort of drama happening with her. I'm not gonna go into details, but she was always whining, feeling depressed, crying for attention, didn't want to be alive etc. So as an end result, I stopped communication with her and deleted her because she started to suck the life out of me. Then after a year or so, I visited her profile to check on her and noticed that she hadn't been online since our fall out. No new posts or updates, and it left me worried sick. Tried calling her, but even her number was out of service. I cried and cried because I thought she was dead. I felt guilty and responsible  Recently (after 6 or 7 years) she messaged me on FB from a secretive profile. Guys, I was SO happy. I cried happy tears. Real human salt water tears. Now I'm not going to say her business that has been happening for the past years, but I feel like she hasn't changed. She is STILL a negative Nancy. I feel like she is not learning, and she keeps inflicting pain on herself by putting herself in sad situations. She has been talking really negative about life and people lately, and I'm really starting to get filled with dread every time she calls/texts. You see, all she ever seems to have going on are the bad things. Can anyone offer me any tips on how to make things a bit easier? |
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@tazdevil | 25 January 19 |
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Now I understand that we all have bad days, and I really like to help/support my friends when they turn to me for comfort. But with her, it's 24/7. I try to cheer her up as much as I can, but it gets SO exhausting. Whenever I ask her how her day is, she says 'rubbish' followed by endless rants about her day/life and people. Pls help me I'm begging!
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@crail | 25 January 19 |
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I've met a few people like this over the years here 
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@crail | 25 January 19 |
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I have no advice  just can't stand those type of people. Mostly female too
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@tazdevil | 25 January 19 |
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I feel bad for posting this now crail because I have a soft corner for her  I want to look out for her, but I have my own sanity/mental health to look out for first. Is that bad or sound selfish?
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@crail | 25 January 19 |
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No, people like that drain your soul
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@mz.c | 25 January 19 |
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Yeah I've cut someone out my life before who was like that because it was making me feel crap. It was constant self inflicted drama.
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@bozzalad | 25 January 19 |
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@ tazdevil - 25.01.19 - 09:00pm Forgive me for the long post, but I need some advice about a friend of mine. So about 10 years ago (now this is where it gets long lol) I met this girl on a chat site, and we ended up becoming REALLY close friends. We talked daily, but there was always some sort of drama happening with her. I'm not gonna go into details, but she was always whining, feeling depressed, crying for attention, didn't want to be alive etc. So as an end result, I stopped communication with her and deleted her because she started to suck the life out of me. Then after a year or so, I visited her profile to check on her and noticed that she hadn't been online since our fall out. No new posts or updates, and it left me worried sick. Tried calling her, but even her number was out of service. I cried and cried because I thought she was dead. I felt guilty and responsible Recently (after 6 or 7 years) she messaged me on FB from a secretive profile. Guys, I was SO happy. I cried happy tears. Real human salt water tears. Now I'm not going to say her business that has been happening for the past years, but I feel like she hasn't changed. She is STILL a negative Nancy. I feel like she is not learning, and she keeps inflicting pain on herself by putting herself in sad situations. She has been talking really negative about life and people lately, and I'm really starting to get filled with dread every time she calls/texts. You see, all she ever seems to have going on are the bad things. Can anyone offer me any tips on how to make things a bit easier? mirror mirror on the wall who is the nicest of them all the mirror laughed and gave a grunt and said it sure ain't you you whinging c.un.t |
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@slago | 25 January 19 |
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I dislike negative people, we all have our own s**t going on to deal with negativity on the daily. I often try to offer help, but when I decide it's enough, I give them the cold shoulder and never look back
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@iilmadme | 25 January 19 |
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You have to think of your own well being.if it was someone in real life i'd suggest trying to encourage them out of it somehow
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@tazdevil | 25 January 19 |
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I love her as a person/friend, and I don't want to lose this friendship AGAIN so I don't know how to handle this situation. It becomes very difficult to engage with her because she's constantly pouring her problems on me. I want to be a good friend and be there for her yet at the same time, her constant negativity is beginning to have a toll on me.
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@deusexmachina | 25 January 19 |
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Maybe she was in pain and needed a friend to listen and show a little bit of empathy. I can see how that clashed with your narcissistic histionics.
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@crail | 25 January 19 |
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@ deusexmachina - 25.01.19 - 09:30pm Maybe she was in pain and needed a friend to listen and show a little bit of empathy. I can see how that clashed with your narcissistic histionics. You've never met a soul sucker, have you. There's only so much you can take. If it goes on for years |
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@deusexmachina | 25 January 19 |
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I am not the nurturing and attentive type. That's not whT they look for in their interactions with me.
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@ogdenz | 25 January 19 |
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You should message her regularly updating her how your life is getting better all the time. Tell her about your lottery win,new boyfriend, etc.
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@peta | 25 January 19 |
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Sounds like a lot for you to deal with, It isnt for everyone, maybe she needs a YOU in her life. I dunno, if it isnt too mentally demanding or self scarifickng for you then you should still be her friend, but if its too much for you them step away. It takes s truly sting Leones to deal with someone like thats ithiut it affecting them, so think about that. |
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@trashy | 25 January 19 |
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Put her in touch with Hep.
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@crail | 25 January 19 |
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@ trashy - 25.01.19 - 10:45pm Put her in touch with Hep. You're alive! We thought you were dead |
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@mikeymk | 25 January 19 |
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What just happened here..?!
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@trashy | 25 January 19 |
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I'm dead on the inside if that counts?
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@mikeymk | 25 January 19 |
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But you've got a pulse, right?
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