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@igwenze | 25 July 11 | |
Three desperate ill men met dia doctors 1day 2 discuss dia options.1 wz An alcoholic.. Chain smoker and a hmos*xual. The doctors, adressin all of dem said if u indulge in these vices one more time,u wil surely die.they left d doctors office n each convinced dat he wil not indulge in such again. While walkin 2wards d subway for dia return,they passed a bar.An acoholic,hearin d loud noise n beer aroma.he couldn't stop him self. Hiz buddies accompanied him into d bar where he took 3shots of whiskey.As soon as he drops d tumbler,he fell of 4rum his stool n died. His companion somewhat shaken,let d bar n realized how serious they must take d doctor's words. As they walk along,they come up a cigarette b*tt lying on d ground still burning. The hmos*xual looked at d chain-smoker n said You know if u bend over to pick that up,we're both dead. |
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@igwenze | 25 July 11 | |
As d plane wz going overseas,D pilot realized dat after they had taken off dat d plane wz carring 2much of weight n if they didn't lighten d load,they were going 2 crash. So,dey dropped off d freight,d plane wz still heavy,den d lauggages,still heavy too!. So d pilot Announced 2 d passengers what wz goin on n asked 15 volunteers 2 jump off d plane wit para e.d navy had been alerted,so dey would hv ships waitin 4 dem below n dey would get pass 2 fly free on this Airline 4 d rest of dia lives. No one budged. So d pilot say's Ok,we're goin 2 pick people 2 jump but fairly.we'll go by Alphabets,race by race. Please! African American step 2 d front of d plane now! No one moved. All blacks,step 2 the front please! No one moved. All coloured step 2 the front please! No one still moved. At this point,a little nigerian boy asked him father,Dad aren't we African American,Black or coloured ??? D father replied n said No son,Today we're Negros and if sum1 dosen't hurry up n step up 2 d front, we're gonna be Zulu!! |
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@igwenze | 6 August 11 | |
A bride tells ha husband honey,u kno i'm a virgin nd i don't kno anytin abt s*x.can u xplain it 2 me? Ok swithrt,we wil call ua private place d prison and call my private thing d prisoner so,wat we do is,put d prisoner insyd prison and dey made luv 1st tym. Afterward,d guy is lyin face up on d bed,smilin in satisfaction. He'z wife giggles n said honey! D prisoner seems 2 hv escaped don't worry darlin,we will re-imprison him again! Dey made luv again. D wife,thoroughly enjoyed d new xperience of makin luv.gives him smile n saidhoney! D prisoner is out again. Alright sweety,d man struggles wit all his strength n made luv again. Afta wardz,he lay back on his bed totally xhusted. 5mins later,she giggles darlin,d prisoner hv xcaped again o!. .... D husband Yells!!! u want 2 kill d prisoner?? It's not life sentence ok.abeg slip mak i slip oooO!! |
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@igwenze | 6 August 11 | |
An 18yr old gal ws impregnated nd ha dad ws shoutin,cursing nd sayin who ws dat pig dat did this to u?? D gal pick ha fone nd makes a call.... Half hour,a ferrari car stopped in their house nd a fine impaccable well dressed young man wit an xpensive suit enta dia house.. He sits in d livin rum nd tell d father nd d mother of d gal sayin U daughter had informed me what happened but I can't marry ha bcos of my personal family situations but i wil take care of d child nd d gal 2 d highest level. If she gave birth 2 a gal,i wil build a duplex 4 ha, a jeep nd giv ha 2millon. If its a boy..i wil giv built a duplex,a jeep,giv him 5million nd part of my wil. But if she has a miscarriage,wat do u suggest i slud do?? D father placed his hands on d man's shoulder nd said U will sleep with ha again |
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@igwenze | 11 September 11 | |
I waz walkin past a mental hospital and all d patients ther were shouting...13...13..13..... The walls were 2 high so i peeped tru d hole on d wall 2 see wat ws happening. One idiot among them poked me with a stick on my eye and dey all shouted ...14...14...14. Since den i learnt 2 mind my own biznex. |
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@igwenze | 11 September 11 | |
A tiny man fainted outsyd Mr. Biggs and soon,crowd formed around him to see. A passer-by suggested giv him sum water,it wil help. D man heard dis and opens one eye and replied comot from here,idiot!! U wan spoil market 4 me ( i want Mr biggs food not water!! )
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@igwenze | 11 September 11 | |
A 12yrz old boi ws accused of rape in d court. His lady lawyer holds his pen-is sayin Ua honour,can this rape?? :...D boi whispers,don't shake it ooO!, we will lose d CASE.
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@portiap | 14 September 11 | |
Q-wat dd d elephant sey 2 d nyked man.A-how do u breath through somtin so small?
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