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@lil_evil | 4 December 10 | |
@1220214 | 10 March 11 | |
? A Packer fan was enjoying himself at the game in a packed Lambeau Field, until he noticed an empty seat down in front. He went down and asked the guy next to it if he knew whose seat it was. The guy said, Yes, that's my wife's seat. We have never missed a game since the Lombardi days, but now my wife is dead. The fan offered his sympathy and said it was really too bad he couldn't find some relative to give the ticket to so they could enjoy the game together... Oh no, the guy said, they're all at the funeral. |
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@1220214 | 10 March 11 | |
A guy was walking on the beach when he notices another guy tanning on the beach. The guy had a strong build and a great body. But he had a vey small head. So the guy goes up to him and says excuse but I noticed you on the beach and I must say that you have a great body but why is your head so small? The man replies well one day I was walking on this very same beach and I caught a Mermaid sun-bathing on those rocks out there. And if you catch a mermaid out of the water you get three wishes. So she asked me what I would like and I said that I was never a really good-looking guy so I wished for a good body. And thats how I got my body. Then I told her that I always wanted to live by the beach so I wished for this house right hear on the beach. And theres my house. Then I told her that it has been a long time since I have been with a women so I asked her if she would sleep with me. She said if I could I would but as you see that from the waist down I'm all fin and that there was no way so could give me any pleasure. Then I said thats ok, how about a little head. |
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@1220214 | 10 March 11 | |
A nun asked her class, What part of the body goes into heaven first? A little girl raises her hand and says, I know, I know, the top of your head. The nun asks, Why do you say that? The little girl says, Because when you die, you go straight up, and the top of your head goes in first! The nun replies, That makes sense, anyone else? Another little girl says, I know, I know, the tips of your fingers. The nun asks, Why the tips of your fingers? The little girl replies, Because when you put your hands together to pray, the tips of your fingers go into heaven first! The nun says, OK, anyone else? Little Johnny is in the back waving his hand. The nun says, OK, Johnny, please tell us what part of the body goes into heaven first? Your feet! Your feet do, for sure! yells Johnny. The nun, puzzled, asks, Why do you think your feet get to heaven first? Because I was walking past my parents' bedroom last night, and my mom was in there, and she had both her feet sticking straight up in the air, and she was yelling 'Oh God, I'm coming. Oh God, I'm coming!' and if my Dad hadn't been holding her down, I think she would have gone! |
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@hamso22 | 25 March 11 | |
Tcher 2 student: who z the youngest of ol @ home? Studnt: my mom. Tcher: y z that?! Student: my dad undress her evryday!
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@adamui | 3 January 13 | |
Thanks bud buddy
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