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@acidized | |
 Your attempts to get your beloved's attention just haven't paid fruit yet? Haunted by thoughts of them with their new lover, whispering sweet nothings to each other while you freeze in the bushes outside their window? Let's face it, it's time to get creative. |
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@tool | 5 April 14 |
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fk em off
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@acidized | 5 April 14 |
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When you watch your beloved sleep from the bushes outside their bedroom window at night, take notes. It shows them that you care. Feel free to take some pictures too. When you are watching your beloved from your designated bush, be sure to send them a text message to let them know that you are watching them. Don't forget to compliment them on their attire, be specific. This works best if you do it at night. http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/HowTo |
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@acidized | 5 April 14 |
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Send gifts every single day (with your brand new credit card), such as dead animals. Everyone loves animals, but hates to take care of them. These can be presented directly, as gifts -- say, a dead cat on the doorstep (white to symbolize purity, perhaps). But you can do better. Arrange them to spell out messages of affection. Using their innards works great too. |
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@obsidian21 | 5 April 14 |
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Or phone them from their room and ask them where are they. They will answer 'I'm in my bedroom' and you tell them if they were in their bedroom they would be talking face to face to you. 
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@acidized | 5 April 14 |
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More accurate link to 'How To'http://goo.gl/Ps9zLF
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@acidized | 5 April 14 |
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@ obsidian21 - 5.04.14 - 04:24pm Or phone them from their room and ask them where are they. They will answer 'I'm in my bedroom' and you tell them if they were in their bedroom they would be talking face to face to you. Wow you're a seasoned campaigner. 
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@obsidian21 | 5 April 14 |
 spyes movies are good after all
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@phemzask | 5 April 14 |
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You don't stalk people to get their attention 
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@redvixen | 5 April 14 |
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my ex messaged me the other day and said he still loved me. WTF? With another chick ten years younger than me... Idiot. I just laughed, happy with my new bloke x
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@acidized | 5 April 14 |
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Befriend her friends, and squeeze the info about her where bouts and future planed visits to Mall or movie theater, etc. Follow her up sneakingly and Text her instantly how cool she's looking in her attire.
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@shade013 | 5 April 14 |
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@ tool - 5.04.14 - 04:17pm fk em off Thissssssssss |
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@acidized | 5 April 14 |
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Stalk them remotely with quadcopter fixed with hi-res night vision cam from right out their bedroom window.
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@peta | 5 April 14 |
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The worst part of stalking is being stalked by someone you haven't even been intimate with. Those are the crazy as* types. Calling from a different state's number every fking day.
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@dre4mz | 5 April 14 |
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i wouldnt wanna stalk my ex, i cant stand him 
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@acidized | 5 April 14 |
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Quitters are losers, and you're no loser (are you?). Keep at it, and you'll be united with your beloved once again, whether in this world or the next. Only hard work and planning can hasten either outcome. 
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@peta | 5 April 14 |
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And you get home only to see his car parked on your street. Trying to see if you have company when you get home, if someone drops you off or if you're alone.
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@obsidian21 | 5 April 14 |
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@ redvixen - 5.04.14 - 04:51pm my ex messaged me the other day and said he still loved me. WTF? With another chick ten years younger than me... Idiot. I just laughed, happy with my new bloke x Its funny when exes remember you after a year 
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@tinydude | 5 April 14 |
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@ peta - 5.04.14 - 05:09pm The worst part of stalking is being stalked by someone you haven't even been intimate with. Those are the crazy as* types. Calling from a different state's number every fking day. it's when the states get closer and closer you need to worry 
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@tool | 5 April 14 |
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@ phemzask - 5.04.14 - 04:49pm You don't stalk people to get their attention what do you do it for then? |
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@redvixen | 5 April 14 |
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I lived with him bout 12 years lol. letan from here. He joined up after I got with Steve and stalked us for a bit. Then we became civil lol
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