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@djdean | |
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Just found this interesting article from Terrorizer magazine, and I want to share it with you. 20. Monkeys Are Machine Guns The sideproject (another one) from Anaal Nathrakhs Mick Kenney and two of Combichrist are brilliant, and have some superb song titles (Im Not Racist, I Just Hate A Lot is an office favourite), but the name blows. It was kept in the lower reaches of this list only by the amusing mental image of monkey s**t being fired off at 100 rounds per minute. 19. The Tony Danza Tap Dance Extravaganza If Tony Danza could tap dance to this, the footage would be the most watched thing on YouTube. Making crushingly brilliant and totally deranged metal does not expunge the truly rubbish name though. 18. An Autumn For Crippled Children This scored highly on the meaningless front. What exactly does this mean, and is there a way we can discuss this without sounding like Frankie Boyle? Probably not. 17. Clinging To The Trees Of A Forest Fire We really didnt want to include these fine crushing fellows, especially after their great split with Nesseria earlier this year, but for all the musical brilliance, the name is daft. If the forest is on fire, how do you cling on to the trees? Why would you want to? 16. And So I Watch You From A Far This isnt necessarily a bad name, but its very creepy and unnecessarily long. Stalker would have had the same implications and taken half the time to say. 15. Success Will Write Apocalypse Across The Sky We know everyone loves some grindy death metal, and we know this is a William S. Burroughs reference, but its simply excessive, and out of context means fk all. Also, SWWAATS is an unintentionally silly acronym. 14. From A Second Story Window Without even entering into debates about whether or not there should be an e in Story, this means nothing. What is from a second storey window? Are you falling? Because thats not all that |
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@djdean | 9 January 14 |
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Because thats not all that high up. Is it a view? Because youre still not that high up. This is a classic case of try to sound clever, end up saying nothing. 13. Acid Mothers Temple The Melting Paraiso U.F.O. The Japanese experimentalists managed to come up with a name that takes longer to say than the running time of Reign In Blood. If theyd stuck with Acid Mothers Temple, they might have got away with it, but extending it was not the way to go. 12. The Number Twelve Looks Like You This might be the name of a Twilight Zone episode, but it also sounds like a bingo call gone wrong. They do get kudos for a pretty cool blog explaining why they split up though . 11. The Sun Came Up On The Left These American underground black metallers might be rather good, but the name is totally without meaning. Also, what black metaller allows themselves to be hit by the sunlight? Surely you should be in a cave somewhere cultivating a lifeless, pale complexion. 10. Arsonists Get All The Girls No they dont. Just no. Were not going to have an Alan Partridge moment, but they dont. Sorry. 9. Iwrestledabearonce AKAwevehadfartoomuchcoffeeandourspacebarisbroken. Wrestlingbearsmaybeseriouslyfkingmetal, butthenamesstilldaft. 8. Flagitious Idiosyncrasy In The Dilapidation Even once you look up what flagitious means (and we know you did), this still means absolutely nothing beyond Look mum! Ive got a thesaurus!. 7. Vincent Prices Orphan Powered Death Machine We came across these guys after undertaking extensive research, and discovered they were a local hardc*re band somewhere in Pennsylvania before going their separate ways. The name was so heroically rubbish we felt compelled to include them. 6. Mincing Fury And Guttural Clamour Of Queer Decay Admittedly, the idea of mincing fury does make us smile (and would probably make a good name for a power metal parody band) but these |
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@djdean | 9 January 14 |
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Czech grinders have us scratching our heads trying to work out what the hell it means. 5. We Butter The Bread With Butter Out of all the ideas for band names that are going to make someone interested, at which particular point did they think I know! Buttering breads really cool, so lets incorporate that into our name. Thats a fairly lame idea. Making it long and lame is worse. The name is, terrifyingly, better than their music though 4. Paladins of the Golden Power Fights With the Great Sword Of Eternal Magic And The Great Kings Will This band would have won hands down, had they not been a parody power metal act. It is quite effective at taking the pi*s out of the sword- waving elf-obsessives, but takes it just a little too far. And then keeps going. And going. And in a world where theres already Fairlyand (ace band, daft name), isnt the funniest available. 3. Kiss The an*s Of A Black Cat Because obviously thats a mental we all wanted. A cats balloon knot belongs nowhere near the human mouth. Under any circumstances. Even in a band name. 2. UnglUnlRrlhChchch Erm I we but no. 1.Paracoccidioidomicosisproctitissarcomucosis These Mexican goregrinders win by an absolute lightyear, mangling the entire medical dictionary into one word so long you could listen to the entire Kreator discography before youd got half way through. This is truly, spectacularly, and unnecessarily long. |
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@vampboy | 9 January 14 |
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@djdean | 9 January 14 |
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hahaha
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