to hisflame....you will find a difference in bdsm'ers, lifestylers, and kinksters.

and alot of people (men) think sub's are an easy sh ag or desperate/easy

we ya just gotta love that...door mat mentality..the slave or sub is just a door mat--ya walk over them--treat them as You wish....nah sorry cannot subscribe to that thought process as a Dom or when I was a sub.

Treat each O/other with respect.

to Nottsdom....it comes down to how the sub acts/carries themselves. I was always told and it was/is My Mentors household rules. The sub-slave-property....is to act appropriate to their station. And always know the behavior reflects of the Master/Mistress/Dominant.

With the increased interest within the 'scene' due to the god awful 50 shades books, far too many people are making presumptions as to what the 'scene' is and isn't. One of these is that any 'kink' relationship requires less effort than a vanilla one. In my experiences, it's the complete opposite