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@cptpants | 14 September 10 |
The easiest way to get a man to do something, is to suggest he is too old for it
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@mztiklz | 16 September 10 |
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@cptpants | 16 September 10 |
POTATOES wrapped in tin-foil and kept in a cupboard become a welcome consolation if your house burns down
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@cptpants | 16 September 10 |
GEORGE MICHAEL. Stop people recognising you in prison by growing thick stubble and wearing dark glasses at all times
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@cptpants | 16 September 10 |
A FRAMED photo of yourself brushing your hair or having a shave saves the expense of costly mirrors in the bathroom
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@cptpants | 16 September 10 |
SHOPLIFTERS get your kicks on the 'net by putting items into your shopping basket on Amazon and then leaving without paying
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@cptpants | 16 September 10 |
NEVER moon a werewolf!!
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@cptpants | 4 October 10 |
Hi there, Lewis Martin here, ace consumer expert and top financial guru, you mayve seen me on daytime TV or heard my popular slot on Radio 2 and I'm here on Prodigits to help you make the most of your money. At the moment the question that Im asked most is Where can I invest my money now that interest rates have fallen to record low levels making Building Society and Bank savings schemes as worthless as hiding your cash under the mattress? well my answer to that question, which may be a surprise to some people, is one word, Africa. Yes, thanks to the internet, the African investment sector has really taken off in recent years and I would have to recommend putting your cash into any of the numerous schemes that can be found in your e-mails in tray, although sometimes these gems can be hidden in your junk folder as they are often removed by overzealous spam filters. For instance, only yesterday, I received correspondence from a Doctor Godswill Ebola, pointing out to me a fantastic investment opportunity, that I have to concede I didnt fully understand but it involved millions of dollars which needed to be released from a UN fund set up by the deposed leader of the Nigerian army, the perfect example of a low risk, high yield investment. Ive forwarded all my bank details to the good doctor and will let you know how I get on, always remember the famous dictum, if something sounds too good to be true then seize it as quick as you can before someone else does. Of course making your money go further is not all about saving but also about minimizing your spending, and this is what Ill be discussing next time. Anyway thats enough of my top tips for now, remember pinch those pennies and the pounds will pile up. |
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