You claim to be open-minded because you listen to Kiss, ACDC, Guns N Roses or any other non-metal rock band

How can anyone listen to non-metal?

Non-metal is gay, except for the stuff you listen to to re-assure yourself that youre open-minded

The only black metal band you listen to is Venom

Anything with the word Core is emo cr*p

You complain about gimmicks in metal and not having a gimmick is a gimmick in itself

You get offended by drum machines

Theres nothing metal at all about metalcore. Therefore it is inferior music

You say Stay Metal or Metalhead For Life to fellow Motorhead and Iron Maiden fans

Opeth is generic melodic death but theyre too experimental for you because of their acoustic guitars

You b*tch about how Opeths d*mnation alb*m failed to be metal,even though the band made it as an experimental progressive rock alb*m for fun

Black Label Society actually doesnt bore you

Solos are your favourite parts of a song

You refuse to listen to anything that doesnt have an electric guitar

There is nothing gay about Judas Priest!

You could see yourself listening to Repulsion and say theyre one of the grind bands, although you dont listen to them, but say you like them to appear as if youre open to some grindcore

Saying metal is superior is not an opinion but a fact and your evidence is a Black Sabbath alb*m

Lemmy is God, end of discussion

Anything too fast is noisecore. Noisecore is

Killswitch Engage is a guilty pleasure

You b*tch about music that has ty riffs

Metalcore is not music!

Commercial glam rock is more respectable than underground hip-hop

You actually buy that collectors edition box set of old 80s bands because theres nothing else to buy in this age of dead music. Its the same thing repackaged people!

Youve been talking about how metal has been dying over the years

A song lasting more than 10 minutes is unbearable

It has a few good riffs but the rest is is something you say about albums you think had potential but failed because they were too modern

And Justice For All.... was Metallicas downfall, yet you still own everything after that

Liking Thrash crossover shows you are eclectic

You still b*tch about Metallica as if nobody else could see how ty they are now except you

Morbid Angel is grindcore nonsense

Grindcore is noisecore, therefore grindcore is

All core sounds the same

Converge and Korn play the same type of don't they?

Breakdowns are annoying